Mission in Zambia: It's All about the Fruit

55 days. No meat. No cheese. No ice cream. Could a spiritual message really emerge from this regiment? Apparently, yes. And not just any spiritual message, but the humbling, soul searching, repentance kind.

Only a few days into the holy fifty where we celebrate Christ’s resurrection and await His ascension, the internal work of Lent and Holy Week is still alive inside of me.

He called me to examine my impatience, frustration, and desire for control – all manifestations of my pride and my earthly focus. Sounds like fun, right? Grueling, but incredible, this has been the first time I can say that I truly experienced Holy Week like it was intended.

Allow me to share my quiet time just one week before Holy Week commenced:

Each time I forgo You in favor of what I want to do in the flesh, I am yet again called to focus my every thought and movement on eternal life with You. I continue to be at home in the flesh, and absent from You. You are calling me to stop straddling the two worlds, but to walk only by faith, not by sight, that I might be absent from the body to present with You. You are calling me to absolutes, uncompromising, perfected hearts absolutes. You want my heart and flesh to cry out to You, for my soul to yearn and faint for Your courts. The only way that this is possible is to feel burdened by the desires of this world in favor of a life full, totally, and completely with You. Lord, I desire not to be at home in the flesh, but instead to earnestly desire eternal life with You.

Repeatedly over this Lent You have pulled my focus to eternal life. Each time my eyes fall again to this world, You again grant me another passage. I want to live the life Your calling me to live, one totally and fully geared towards preparing for eternity. I know this entails heeding Your evening callings to commune more with You, but I also pray that You reveal to me where else I am home in the body that I may let go of those too.

I came to Zambia determined to sort out what my talents were and how to use them to glorify Biggie. I even wrote this down as a goal, discussed it with folks, and reviewed my experiences from the lens of understanding it. And then Biggie laid the frame-shift smackdown. In a conversation with Father Abraham, he highlighted that it’s not about talent, it’s about fruit (although, much to my dismay, not the edible kind). Talents are what the flesh emphasizes, talents are what the world obsesses about, I mean, let’s be honest, aren’t talent and strengths the focus of every job interview? What Biggie is saying, is forget the talent, I want fruit. Fruit is the focus of eternal life, fruit is what I called you to bear on earth, fruit is what it is really all about. Ah yes, and patience is a fruit of the Holy Spirit, and I am sorely lacking in this department. My thoughts have long been ravished by my impatience, and subsequently my frustration. What Biggie revealed to me, was that truly learning patience would, not only be bearing the fruit of the Holy Spirit, but it would be to also come to explore, understand, and know another dimension of love. And therein, my dear friends, lies the essence of this journey.